Being You for Real

Friendships are a source of both joy and heartache.

Women have a greater need for friendships than men do.  Our friendships run deeper.  Men like to “do things” with friends.  Women want to “know things” about each other.  We like to do things together too, but we want to talk while we do it! We want to be real friends, who trust each other and are there for each other. Friends are part of your total prosperity, enriching your life in so many ways.

Girls are naturally drawn to each other.  A girl’s first experience with heartache may have been over a lost “best friend” rather than a “boy friend”.  When friendships are lost, women grieve. We do not just grieve for the friendship, but also for the secrets shared, the trust given and the acceptance enjoyed.  If betrayed, the pain runs deep.  No one can cause you more harm than someone you have deeply trusted.

Your best friend in school knew who you were afraid of and who you secretly liked.  She knew you still kept your Barbies in your room and that you cried for a week when Shaun Cassidy got married.  I’ll bet you remember a time when a friend you trusted proved not to be a trustworthy secret keeper.  It cut like a knife and that is when it starts – the creation of the wall and mask—your public facade.

The “you” you are willing to let the world see. You don’t want to risk letting people see the bad stuff, because if  they never see the real you,  you will be accepted and enjoy great friendships. Yes, we hide behind our constructed reality, thinking we are better off, but we lose so much.  If no one knows you are struggling, you deny them the chance to comfort you and keep you accountable.

If you are being accepted by people because of a facade you present, deep down you know it is only that disguise being accepted. The real you will be terribly alone and you know it.  That is why so many women you envy for their seeming perfection are struggling with deep insecurities, afraid to shine their light out in the world. One of the many teachings in Monetary Identity is to know who you are and what you bring to the table of relationships.

How do we start?

However your masquerade started and was reinforced, you need to look at how to take the mask off and start to be real.  Before allowing others to truly see us, we must accept who we are.  If you are not comfortable with the real you, you will always hide behind walls. Monetary Identity is a great way to begin and continue that process. Love to really see you there!

Getting to a Growth Mindset

How to Nurture a Growth Mindset – The 3-Step Process

One of Rich Chicks’ principles is prosperity–true prosperity of all aspects of your life: health, spirit, wealth.  Sometimes we get stuck in a pattern that does not bring prosperity into our lives. That’s when you need to examine your core beliefs and values to see if they are what you truly believe and want in your life. Monetary Identity, starting on October 11 helps you get to the growth mindset and out of fixed beliefs and ideas that are holding you back.

Step One – Awareness: Hear Your “Fixed Mindset” Voice

You most likely already know your “inner critic.” The first step is to identify it and the times you hear it. These are times that you’re brought back to a fixed mindset. Practice awareness by identifying the voice when you hear it. Remember what preceded those thoughts–look for clues.

Step Two – Reframe

Once you recognize that inner critic, you can learn to control it. The way that you interpret challenges is up to you. It’s hard to reframe the voice when you have ingrained thinking patterns. Imagine giving advice to a friend. We’re generally harder on ourselves than others. Take each statement and imagine that you’re giving advice, then reframe it

Step Three – Action: Take on the Growth Mindset

Choose a challenge that you’ve been avoiding and try it again. Turn your fixed mindset around. Start with one challenge and then apply it to the next once you have success.

Where Do Limiting Mindsets Come From?

Limiting beliefs come from a place or event in your lifetime experience.  As children we are conditioned to think in more fixed mindset terms.


IQ tests give you a ranking or identity as a child. Most of us develop an identity based on a perceived level of intelligence, and it becomes a label that we carry around. Modern research shows that intelligence is much more fluid than the system suggests.


Money beliefs again usually originate within the family. Limiting beliefs express feelings of guilt, hopelessness or scarcity. These are obviously not useful.


Early educational experiences also play a part in shaping limiting beliefs about work. The current education system does not train people to become growth thinkers or develop an entrepreneurial mindset

Other Limiting Beliefs from School

Some ideas you might have internalized include:

  • Obey Authority
  • Schools and workplaces are hierarchical–those in positions of authority know best.We learn this chain of command very early in our lives.
  • Follow Rules–this system naturally requires rules and discipline. There is a need to maintain order early on, but carrying it on into adulthood doesn’t serve us well.
  • Learn and Then Do. Tasks in school are given with instructions, learning starts with theory and ends in practice. This is the opposite of the growth mindset.
  • Comparing with Others. School evaluates and grades to compare with others, which fosters fixed thinking. This fixed, negative thinking can hold you back.

Take These Steps

 Even a small shift can create a tremendous amount of change toward a growth mindset. You have learned how to make these changes step by step. It’s easy to fall back into old mindsets, just remember these three fundamental steps to make your new mindset take root:

  • Awareness
  • Reframing
  • Action

This is only a small part of what life-changing ideas Monetary Identity brings to your life. Check out Monetary Identity! Use code gap to get and early bird discount (expires September 30)

What Keeps You From Getting Where You Want to Go in Your Life?

What is Mindset?

One of the concepts we present in Monetary Identity is that of mindset. Mindset is a collection of beliefs, including basic qualities like intelligence, talents and personality, a concept was originally formulated by psychologist Carol Dweck.

Factors like intelligence and ability do not guarantee success. Mindset and beliefs about abilities play a key role in fuelling success. We all know someone incredibly gifted who doesn’t achieve their potential.

Whether conscious or unconscious, negative mindsets can adversely impact success. A positive mindset can help activate potential. Examining your beliefs and your mindset is deep work, Monetary Identity helps with the discovery process enabling you to begin to develop a prosperity mindset and move forward in your life.

What Holds You Back? The Inner Critic

Mindset and beliefs can be totally unconscious. The voices in your head–your ‘Inner Critic’ is an inner voice that occurs on continuous repeat. The Inner Critic might tell you that you’re wrong or inadequate. Some people are very aware of this voice, while others aren’t. Many people mistakenly identify with this voice as their own. Mindset is malleable–you can develop or evolve your mindset and make profound differences with small shifts in awareness and habits. Shifting to a growth mindset is the next step!

Reaching for Success: Growth vs. Fixed Mindsets

Research had identified two types of mindsets

  • Fixed
  • Growth

Having a fixed mindset means that you believe characteristics are static and cannot be changed. Some people constantly feel the need to prove themselves. People with fixed mindsets often get consumed in proving themselves in their jobs or relationships. This comes from a need to confirm existing characteristics and static labels.

A growth mindset is one where an individual sees characteristics as developing and evolving. A growth mindset doesn’t compel a person to constantly prove themselves. They know they can change and grow with experience. A key element in success is a willingness to learn and grow.

A fixed mindset can be seen in someone who masters something quickly then plateaus.

A growth mindset is seen in someone who learns gradually, accepting new challenges along the way.

Mindset is situational

You may use growth mindset in certain situations and the fixed in others, often without realizing it. If you’re unsure, you’re more likely to adopt a fixed mindset. Defaulting to a fixed mindset instead of looking at options can limit success, health and happiness in the long term. In Monetary Identity, which starts October 11, you will be able to determine your mindset and work on it for maximum personal growth. Reserve your seat in this life-changing education.

Ask for What You Really Want!

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to get everything they want? If they want to go on an exotic vacation, they suddenly get their wish. If they want a promotion, it happens. So how can you make this same ‘magic’ appear for you?

The only true way you will actually get what you want is by learning how to ask for it and then take action! Nothing is magically going to happen, but you can start the wheels turning by putting things into motion. Here’s an example:

Are you waiting to be discovered so that you can be promoted to the next level? And you can’t figure out why you are always overlooked when a better position becomes available?

Here’s a couple of reasons for this:

  1. Does anyone even know that you are looking to be promoted?
  2. Have you demonstrated that you are capable of doing this particular job?

Most likely you are just sitting at your desk each day doing a wonderful job waiting to be noticed! Unfortunately, that method is not going to get you too far. While you may be fantastic at what you do, you need to take action so that others know what you are looking for.  If you don’t ask for the promotion you will never get it.

Now let’s look at what steps you might take:

First you need to make it known, to the right people, that you would love to be considered for a new opening. If the position is posted on your company job board then apply for it.

In the meantime, you should start demonstrating that you have the experience and knowledge to perform this particular job. Of course, you don’t want to start just doing the job, you want to get paid for it! But find some way that you can show that you have the skills to do it.

The worst thing you can do is to just ‘hope’ that you will be asked to fill any vacant position. Your supervisor is most likely aware of how well you do your current job, and they may think you are perfectly happy.

If you feel a little awkward about applying or even asking for a better position, then bring the subject up in your next employee review meeting. Most companies will give you the opportunity to ask questions. So make it clear that if a certain vacancy becomes available you would like to be considered for it.

So get out there and ask for what you want!

Monetary Identity Part One: Session 4

Monetary Identity is the relationship you have with the resources around you. It plays out in every facet of your life and is an intricate balance of knowing your resources and harnessing them into a manner that is consistent with your personal goals.

Money is only part of the whole prosperity picture. There are ten areas to Monetary Identity™ and each is important in its own right. What is working for you in these five areas? What needs improvement? Personal, deep learning is an investment in yourself that will pay dividends for a lifetime. You deserve this! Register now! Use code gap for a generous $50.00 tuition credit. Hurry–discount ends March 17.

  1. Core Values.
  2. How you use your networks.
  3. How your networks use you .
  4. Monetary investments.
  5. Debt relationships.


Monetary Identity Session 2: Values-Based Lifestyle

Hesitant to sign up because you don’t know what Monetary Identity is all about? Read our series of blog posts that explain the amazing content.

What do we mean by living a value-based lifestyle?  We mean truly understanding what your top five (approximately) values are that you absolutely stand by.  These are the brick-and-mortar foundation of your beliefs of what it means to be you and supports the actions you take.

It is hard work to identify your top values and actually explain them to yourself and others. Monetary Identity takes values clarification to the next level by allocating resources to those values. Your values show up in how you make decisions, how you live your life, how you spend or don’t spend your money. Register now to be be part of this life-enhancing process. Use code gap to get an impressive $50.00 off the price until March 17.

Values are different from beliefs, and many people get them confused. People use both to guide their actions and behavior, but they are essentially different. Values unite people—beliefs separate. Many people are not aware of many of the limiting beliefs they have about money, work and their own talents. These are the beliefs that will push prosperity away from you.

Values and beliefs both guide your decisions—sometimes subconsciously. Bringing them into the light and examining values and beliefs often surprises people. The values clarification part of this series has been life-changing for many of our students.  Register now



Monetary Identity: Understanding the Gap

The Monetary Identity class, which starts March 22, begins with an examination of “the gap.” What “gap” are we referring to?  We are referring to the gap of what we have been taught regarding what employers want and what the new rules are.

What business is looking for in the job area has changed. Now your outside life is included in your professional life, especially if you are seeking upward mobility.  Do you have a life outside of work?  What is the quality of that life outside of work?  Do you volunteer?  Have you received any social awards?  This is what employers or other organizations want to know.  This shows them what kind of leader you are.  It shows them your monetary identity.  What is worth your time?  Are you worth their time?  Will you bring social skills along with your business skills?

This gap also includes the still present wage gap between men and women.  Women have the upper edge in combining social skills and business skills.  Women need to realize and understand their worth to companies or other organizations and expect to be rewarded at the same level as a man with the same skills.

If you understand the skills you have, you can determine a clearer picture of your monetary identity.  What is it you want in exchange for those skills? Know what that is and accept only that or better. Monetary Identity: Prosperity from the Inside Out helps you discover what your gap is and appreciate with confidence what you bring to the table. Register here.  Use discount code gap by March 17 to get $50.00 off.

The Deep Dive. Monetary Identity: Prosperity from the Inside Out

This is a critical time to be an active citizen of the United States. And an especially important time to be a woman—trying to hold on to the important gains made in the past on our behalf and human rights not yet realized. Society is in a whirlwind of change, and we are in that whirlwind, trying to figure things out—what’s true, what isn’t. We do indeed live in interesting times.

How do we handle these “interesting times?” What I have noticed over the years that I have been coaching people, mainly women, is a lack of clarity in what they really want. Values clarification is an important part of that discovery process. Making a stand for what you believe in is easy when you know what is truly important to you.

Monetary Identity: Prosperity from the Inside Out is a great way to get in touch with your beliefs and values. The prosperity in your life is in direct relation to your beliefs and values.  Prosperity isn’t just about money. You have way more resources than you realize. Identifying those resources and how they fit into the total picture of your life is incredibly illuminating—shining light into those dark “money black holes” you have avoided. This six-week class starts March 22. Is it life-changing? Yes. And not just your own life. What you learn flows out to others and makes the world a better place for everyone. Don’t delay. Register now. This is the time for you to break out of old patterns and forge a path to where you truly want and need to go in your life. Take the dive into the deep end of the pool–we’ll be there to keep you afloat. Use discount code March to get $50.00 off the registration price.

People Pleasing Isn’t Always Pleasing

Why You Need to Stop Being a People-Pleaser

Do you put everyone before yourself? Is saying yes a habit, more than a true intention? If more people helped others, the world would be a better place, right?  However, psychologist Susan Newman says it can be dangerous to be a constant people-pleaser.

This behavior can lead to you not taking care of your personal obligations, developing resentment for those around you, and eventually feeling under-appreciated and taken advantage of. Newman is the author of The Book of No: 250 Ways to Say and Mean It, and Stop People-Pleasing Forever. She points to the following reasons why you should not let helping others get out of hand.

Your Relationships Can Suffer

You probably want to help everyone, and make everybody happy, if you can’t say no. Sometimes though, trying to please everyone means leaving some people out. You have already agreed to so many obligations there is not enough time left on your schedule. Also, when you take on too many commitments, the quality of your efforts can suffer. This means your personal and business relationships can be damaged as a result.

You Begin to Resent Yourself

A lot of “yes men” and women do not like that part of their personality. They realize that they are stress-filled because they are constantly trying to keep everyone around them happy. They see their own obligations taking a backseat, while the people they do favors for advance in business and in their personal lives. This can cause you to resent yourself, as you recognize your people-pleasing personality is pleasing everyone but you.

learning to fish


You Might be Hurting Those You Care About

If you do everything for your friends, family members and coworkers, they never experience growth. You limit their ability to take on new tasks successfully when you can’t help them, because they may not know what to do on their own. Even if you see someone you care about struggling in a particular endeavor, sometimes it’s best to let them learn the process themselves. Doing it for themselves develops a new skill and an improved sense of self-esteem.

You Might Be Wrong

Really, you are not a mind-reader, are you? Is your behavior based on what you think will please someone else? This is the case with a lot of people-pleasers. They try to guess what will make others happy and then act accordingly, even if it is detrimental to their own situation. Trying to assume what will keep everyone happy could lead to the opposite result.

What Don’t You Want in Your Life?

1417367660gy06iWe can feel appreciation not only for things that we have, but also for things we don’t have! For today’s journal entry, turn your ideas about wealth upside down and think of the all the things that you don’t have, which are also things that you don’t want. Use words and art to express your thanks for what you do not have.

~appreciating when absence is presence, Karen